I was doing business witnessing one day and was perusing a second hand shop while I waited to witness to the shopkeeper. I noticed a "live forever" book on the shelf and managed to work it into my presentation, recommending that the shopkeep have a read. I was a good little dub alright. Sincere, but so very sad and foolish. Seems like a lifetime ago now.
tall penguin
tall penguin
JoinedPosts by tall penguin
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JW Literature in Second Hand Stores
by Nosferatu inwhat kinds of jw literature do you see in the second hand stores?
i often come across copies of the nwt.
recently, i saw a live forever book.
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tall penguin
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why do elders always pass on your private info?
by hamsterbait injust read in another thread how a youngster moved many many miles from his old congo, where he had 'fessed to "self-abuse" (how many of the gb were in the early boy-scouts, i ask?
anyway, the new book study conductor took him to one side after the meeting and asked how successful was he in dealing with his "problem".
this is what gets me so much about letting hlc see your records - they have no sense of tactful kindness or privacy.
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tall penguin
"Not before he told them he met an elder - for 25 years- at a drag ball. This guy had been doing it even before he was appointed"
Puts a whole new spin on 'putting on the new personality'. ;)
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People traumatised by cults other that the WTS
by greendawn inthe wts is just one of the cults that exploits and damages people, besides it there are many others that operate and damage their adherants in a similar or worse way.
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did you happen to come across such individuals that were similarly traumatised by these other cults or read about them on the internet or books?
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tall penguin
"Don't drink the KoolAid unless you have mixed it yourself. (Preferably with some Vodka in it)"
Amen to that Brother James! -
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Dr.Phil's Show on Marriage and those looking for Love- Is Anyone Watching ?
by prophesariah indr. phil's solution to marital & single love life problems is to learn how to fix the one you have or yourself.
his new years resolution for couples is "get your love fix in 2006".
the first couple argues about everything.
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tall penguin
I work in a major book store and there hasn't been much action on this new Dr. Phil book. People just don't seem as interested as they are in his other books.
I'm had a bit of a read through. If you've read his other books, this one is more of the same.
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As the illusion fades, how do you deal with...
by tall penguin inthe reality that life is suffering and sometimes it's just not fair.
i know, i sound like a 5 year old here.
and perhaps emotionally i am to some degree, having bought into the jw "new system" at the age of 5. .
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tall penguin
I thought I'd bring this to the top and add an update from this weekend. I just started reading "Letting Go of the Person You Used To Be" by Tibetan Lama Surya Das. I'm finding it very useful in helping me to let go of the past version of "tall penguin" and to begin to see the current, in-the-now, version of her instead. Moving beyond being an ex-jw and seeing myself as a whole version of myself.
He talks about what I brought up in this thread, the constant need to question and have answers. His comment is that the questionning is healthy. It prompts us on to higher consciousness. It's the need to have immediate answers that causes us heartache. We need to be patient with the process.
I'm entering a more exciting phase of my life now. I'm beginning to get comfortable with the wondering and letting go of the need for answers. Now, I just put my questions on the back burner of my mind, trusting that the answers will come when they're ready or when I'm ready to integrate them. And those answers are not absolute but evolve and grow as I do.
I'm learning each day the truth of this quote from Albert Einstein:
"A problem cannot be solved at the same level of thinking that created it."
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Letting go of the black and white thinking...
by tall penguin ini think that this is the most difficult lesson in leaving the jw world.
the black and white thinking created such a neat little world where everything was so easily explained and categorized, provided you didn't mind living in a bubble.
i think the one area of black and white thinking that caused me the most difficulty and cognitive dissonance was the question of jehovah's will vs. satan's temptations.
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tall penguin
Wow, more great responses. Thanks all.
It's funny, my brother (who was never a baptized jw) ran into one of my dear jw friends in a grocery store this weekend. She asked how he was doing and he shared that 2005 was a year of ups and downs and lots of learning. She then took the opportunity to do the ole "the world is getting worse" bit. My brother didn't bite but instead said, "It all depends how you look at it." The conversation ended there.
It really is sad to me that the whole jw mindset relies on seeing the bad in the world around them. It requires them to see only the black and white of their environment, to the exclusion of all of the beautiful colours. I'm so happy to be moving out of that mindset, challenging as it is.
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feng shui
by peacefulpete injust a brief observation.
the whole feng shui thing is really going mainstream.
everywhere everyone is trying to order their world using priciples of the ancient philosophy.
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tall penguin
Actually there was an article (awake I think) on feng shui and also one on yoga a few years ago. I remember the feng shui article because my mom had a bunch of books on the subject and was really excited about exploring it as a new hobby. Then the article came out and she threw out all her books and went back to her hobby-less existence. *sigh*
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My D/f appeal meeting went amazingly, but the still want to d/f me
by jwfacts insorry how long this is but i found the meeting very exciting.
the short version is i said directly that i do not believe in the wts, feel being d/f is unfair on my jw family so asked them to just leave me alone.
it didn't work.
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tall penguin
Congratulations! Nice work. I admire your courage. I went through an appeal committee about 6 years ago and being in a room with 6 elders is scary to say the least. I'm proud of you for being able to stand your ground with them.
My thought as I read your post was that there may have been at least one elder in that room who was sickened by the behaviour of his fellow elders and may be interested in learning more about what you said. I think you've planted some seeds my friend. Watch as god makes them grow. ;)
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As the illusion fades, how do you deal with...
by tall penguin inthe reality that life is suffering and sometimes it's just not fair.
i know, i sound like a 5 year old here.
and perhaps emotionally i am to some degree, having bought into the jw "new system" at the age of 5. .
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tall penguin
Wow, thanks for all of the feedback. I appreciate the support.
freedomlover, it sounds like we're on this journey at a similar pace. I look forward to continuing to chat with you about this.
wanderlustguy, I actually read "The Road Less Traveled" shortly after leaving the jw's. I loved it. I've read a lot of self-help over the years. I find it useful.
You said "You are enough, and it is ok to hurt." Thank you for this reminder as I still struggle with the question of "am I enough?"
Dave, I really appreciate your heartfelt comments. Whenever you reply to one of my threads I can feel your sincerity. Were you ever an elder? I can see you as having been one of the good ones whose heart would've been torn up by the position.
And thank you for this: "It's fun to watch your mind working, TP! Thanks for sharing, and be assured your posts are helping others every bit as much as they are helping you." It's nice to know we all make a difference in some way.
anewme, you said "I have taken the position of silent observer again. I take also the view that we may be wrong about God and who he is, or that we may be underestimating Him I should say. He may be way more than we previously thought."
I am still open to this possibility as I am doing my best to remain open to all possibilities. Taking the "silent observer" position is a wise course imho.
greendawn, you said "I believe firmly that ultimately everything will be paid for" Somewhere deep down in my heart I believe this too. Part of me still wants to believe in some basic order to the universe, even in the face of conflicting experience. I'll do my best to stay open to this idea.
telltruth, you said "The answers that satisfy, do so because they resonate with the one posing the question."
Yes!!! Your statement resonates with me! :) It's true that as we evolve individually so do the questions we ask and in turn, the answers we receive. I'm learning to stay with the process and trust that all will be made clearer in time.
"The penguin I know and RESPECT, from where I stand; will recieve every answer you need.....because you ask the most wonderful questions." Thanks tell for the respect. It means a lot to me.
Sheepish you said, "I can't swallow that the world is a completely random place. Too much evidence to the contrary for me."
Yes, I do want to believe there is some basic order to things. And a lot of my experience with energy work and with life in general seems to support this belief. I guess what I was feeling when I wrote this thread yesterday was a sense of grief and anger around the suffering I see. I need to come to a place of acceptance that this is how it is right now and that looking forward to anything or anyone in the future to make it right is not helping me in the now.
Satanus, you said, "From my reading and experimentation, i think that there is probably reincarnation. It seems to me that the way it works is that we keep coming back until we get right things that are importint us."
It's funny because I saw an energy healer a few months ago. A very quiet and wise man. He worked with me for about five minutes and then said, "You're a very old soul. You've been around a while. You've entered a life with some very distinct and deep challenges because you needed them to propel you into your next phase of growth."
Not sure I am totally buying this but it does resonate. Basically, he was in line with your student analogy. I'm here to learn the next round of lessons on my way to graduation. This time around I've gotten pretty hard-knocked because it's necessary for my growth. I can handle that. Most days anyhow.
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I feel more grounded today. I'm looking out the window and watching the snow fall and enjoying the moment for what it is. I'm looking forward to recreating my perception of the world, realizing now that this is an ongoing evolution that doesn't end. Thanks to all for your ongoing support. I can feel your presence in my heart as I move through my day. Namaste to you all.
tall penguin -
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As the illusion fades, how do you deal with...
by tall penguin inthe reality that life is suffering and sometimes it's just not fair.
i know, i sound like a 5 year old here.
and perhaps emotionally i am to some degree, having bought into the jw "new system" at the age of 5. .
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tall penguin
the reality that life is suffering and sometimes it's just not fair. I know, I sound like a 5 year old here. And perhaps emotionally I am to some degree, having bought into the jw "new system" at the age of 5.
Growing up thinking there's a purpose for suffering and at the end of it, all will be brought to justice, is a comforting illusion. Even since abandoning the jw mentality, I had taken up the karma view. But in the end, it still feels like the same sort of mental masturbation; the view that there is some internal balance to the universe.
So, if the reality is that there is no ultimate justice and that humans may never be held accountable for their actions, how do you deal with that on a day to day basis? When you're getting screwed over by people you love and trust or being let down by the "justice system" how do you keep it all in perspective?
As a jw I could write it all off as "Vengeance is mine says Jehovah. I shall repay." But even that caused cognitive dissonance as it didn't seem like anything really gets repaid since death, according to the jw view, put us all back on a level playing field.
So, in the day to day of it, how do you deal with this? What comforts you when you and others are suffering, when justice is elusive and life just doesn't seem fair?
tall penguin